The end of the school year is a stressful time for many students and teachers. Exams, changing grade levels or moving to a new school, graduation and other changes can all induce stress. In these stressful moments, many of us retreat into ourselves so that we can focus, limiting communication with our friends and increasing our isolation.

Researcher Shawn Achor writes, “Time with family and friends…these are the first things to go when we’re in crisis mode. But even though we’re giving our work our undivided attention, our productivity is declining, and as the deadline nears, our goal seems to be slipping further and further out of reach. And so we hunker down, shut off our cell phones, retreat into the bunker of ourselves and double-lock the door.” Unfortunately, brain research tells us that this is exactly the WRONG thing to do. Achor writes, “The most successful people take the exact opposite approach.  Instead of turning inward, they actually hold tighter to their social support. Instead of divesting, they invest. Not only are these people happier, but they are more productive, engaged, energetic, and resilient.”

Stress is inevitable; we know it is going to happen.  It makes sense, then, to prepare for it – to make stress management proactive.  Here are five simple activities you can do as an individual, or with students, to help their brains focus on the positive, and thus be more resilient in the face of stress.

1. Acts of kindness – spend two minutes each day sending someone in your support network (family, friend, classmate, colleague, etc.) an e-mail or text praising or thanking them for something that person has done well
2. Journaling – spend five minutes writing down what positive moments you experience each day
3. 3 Gratitudes – share with a partner three new things you are thankful each day
4. Meditate – let your brain focus on one thing instead of many things
5. Exercise

For more information on proactively dealing with stress read Shawn Achor’s book The Happiness Advantage, or watch his TED Talk.

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The bear and the bees
An Aesop fable

A bear roaming the woods in search of berries happened on a fallen tree in which a swarm of bees had stored their honey. The bear began to nose around the log very carefully to find out if the bees were at home.

Just then one of the swarm came home from the clover field with a load of sweets. Guessing what the bear was after, the bee flew at him, stung him sharply and then disappeared into the hollow log.

The bear lost his temper in an instant, and sprang upon the log tooth and claw, to destroy the nest. But this only brought out the whole swarm. The poor bear had to take to his heels, and he was able to save himself only by diving into a pool of water.

Moral: Be careful not to lose your temper at the expense of a single difficulty. You may make matters worse. 

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The quails
A story from the Jataka tales

Ages ago a flock of more than a thousand quails lied together in a forest in India. They would have been happy, but that they were in great dread of their enemy, the quail catcher. He used to imitate the call of the quail; and when they gathered together in answer to it, he would throw a great net over them, stuff them into his basket, and carry them away to be sold.

Now, one of the quails was very wise, and he said: “Brothers! I’ve thought of a good plan. In the future, as soon as the fowler throws his net over us, let each one put his head through a mesh in the net and then all lift it up together and fly away with it. When we have flown far enough, we can let the net drop on a thorn bush and escape.”

All agreed to the plan. The next day when the fowler threw his net, the birds all lifted it together in the very way that the wise quail had told them, threw it on a thorn bush and escaped. While the fowler tried to free his net from the thorns, it grew dark, and he had to go home.

This happened many days, till at last the fowler’s wife grew angry and asked her husband: “Why is it that you never catch any more quail?”

Then the fowler said: “The trouble is that all the birds work together and help one another. If they would only quarrel, I could catch them fast enough.”

A few days later, one of the quails accidentally trod on the head of one of his brothers, as they alighted on the feeding ground.

“Who trod on my head?” angrily inquired the quail who was hurt.

“Don’t be angry, I didn’t mean to tread on you,” said the first quail. But the brother quail went on quarreling.

“I lifted all the weight of the net! You didn’t help at all!” he cried.

That made the first quail angry, and before long all were drawn into the dispute. Then the fowler saw his chance. He imitated that cry of the quail and cast his net over those who came together. They were still boasting and quarreling, and they did not help one another lift the net. So the hunter lifted the net himself and crammed them into his basket.

But the wise quail gathered his friends together and flew far away, for he knew that quarrels are the root of misfortune.

Moral: If we work together we can succeed, but if we fight amongst ourselves we will get nowhere.

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See more character quotations in our quotations database.

Learn more about character education.

See more character quotations in our quotations database.

Learn more about character education.