Challenges and change
A glass of milk
A glass of milk
Author Unknown
There was a poor boy who made a living by selling various objects from door to door. This was the way he earned money to pay for his school.
One day, as he was walking from house to house, he felt very hungry and weak. He felt that he couldn’t walk even a few steps. He decided to ask for food at a house. He knocked on the door and was stunned to see a beautiful young girl open the door. With hesitation, he asked the girl for a glass of water.
The young girl understood his condition and offered him a huge glass of milk. Astonished, the boy drank the milk slowly.
“How much do I owe you for this milk?” he asked her.
The girl replied, “I don’t want any money for this.”
The boy thanked the girl from the bottom of his heart and left.
Years passed by and the young girl grew up. Unfortunately, she fell ill and was diagnosed with the rarest kind of nervous disorder. Many experienced doctors were baffled at her condition, and she was admitted to the city hospital with the most advanced facilities.
Dr. Kevin was a renowned neuro specialist and was called in by the hospital to examine her. Even with his extraordinary expertise, Dr. Kevin found the girl’s illness very hard to cure. However, with perseverance and hard work that lasted several months, he was finally able to get the disease under control. With careful medication and monitoring, the girl was eventually cured.
Everyone praised the doctor, but the girl was quite worried about how much the hospital bill would come to. Her family only had a little money kept in the bank, which was by no means enough to pay for such a long treatment in the hospital.
Finally, the girl was given the hospital bill. She opened it and was stunned to see that the bill had been crossed out and cancelled with a note underneath signed by Dr. Kevin.
“Bill paid years ago with a glass of milk!”
Moral: One good deed deserves another.
The same person
Stress and connections
The end of the school year is a stressful time for many students and teachers. Exams, changing grade levels or moving to a new school, graduation and other changes can all induce stress. In these stressful moments, many of us retreat into ourselves so that we can focus, limiting communication with our friends and increasing our isolation.
Researcher Shawn Achor writes, “Time with family and friends…these are the first things to go when we’re in crisis mode. But even though we’re giving our work our undivided attention, our productivity is declining, and as the deadline nears, our goal seems to be slipping further and further out of reach. And so we hunker down, shut off our cell phones, retreat into the bunker of ourselves and double-lock the door.” Unfortunately, brain research tells us that this is exactly the WRONG thing to do. Achor writes, “The most successful people take the exact opposite approach. Instead of turning inward, they actually hold tighter to their social support. Instead of divesting, they invest. Not only are these people happier, but they are more productive, engaged, energetic, and resilient.”
Stress is inevitable; we know it is going to happen. It makes sense, then, to prepare for it – to make stress management proactive. Here are five simple activities you can do as an individual, or with students, to help their brains focus on the positive, and thus be more resilient in the face of stress.
- Acts of kindness – spend two minutes each day sending someone in your support network (family, friend, classmate, colleague, etc.) an e-mail or text praising or thanking them for something that person has done well
- Journaling – spend five minutes writing down what positive moments you experience each day
- 3 Gratitudes – share with a partner three new things you are thankful each day
- Meditate – let your brain focus on one thing instead of many things
- Exercise
For more information on proactively dealing with stress read Shawn Achor’s book The Happiness Advantage, or watch his TED Talk.
Greatness
A blessing in every curse
From our guest contributor, Michael Josephson.
A man and his companion lost their way in a forest. The companion despaired, but the man said maybe some good would come of it. They came upon a stranger who needed the man’s help. The stranger turned out to be a prince who gave the man a beautiful horse.
His neighbors praised his good luck and said, “How blessed you are to have such a magnificent animal.”
The man said, “Who’s to say whether this is a blessing or a curse?”
The next day the horse ran away, and the neighbors said, “How horrible that you were cursed with the loss of your horse.”
The man replied, “Who’s to say whether this is a curse or a blessing? Perhaps some good will come of this.”
The next day the horse returned leading five wild horses. “You were right!” his neighbors exclaimed. “The curse was a blessing in disguise. Now you’re blessed with six horses.”
The man replied, “Perhaps, but who’s to say whether this is a blessing or a curse?”
The next day his only son tried to ride one of the wild horses. He was thrown to the ground and broke his leg. The neighbors said, “How wise you were. Your blessing really was a curse.”
The man replied, “There may be good yet. Who’s to say whether this is a curse or a blessing?”
The next day soldiers came through the village and took every able-bodied boy to fight in a war where it was almost certain all would be killed. Because the man’s son was injured, the boy was the only one not taken. “How blessed are you to keep your son!” the neighbors said.
The man replied, “Who’s to say? I don’t know whether there’s a curse in every blessing, but I am sure there’s a blessing in every curse.”
This is Michael Josephson reminding you that character counts.
Michael Josephson is an influential and internationally renowned champion of character education for youth and ethical conduct in business, government, policing, journalism, sports, healthcare and law. He is credited by many as the person most responsible for reviving and professionalizing the character education in school and youth-serving organizations. In 1992, under the auspices of the Josephson Institute he created CHARACTER COUNTS!, the world’s most widely implemented character development initiative based on a common language of shared values – the Six Pillars of Character) and Pursuing Victory With Honor (1996), a companion program promoting ethics in sports.
Your time
Look for rainbows
8 ways to help kids develop caring mindsets
From our guest contributor, Michele Borba.
REALITY CHECK: 93 percent of adults feel we are failing to instill values in children. What’s more, “being kind and caring” isn’t even high on our kids’ priority lists! Two-thirds of adolescents ranked their own personal happiness as more important than their goodness. It’s time to help our kids switch their focus from Selfie to Unselfie and see themselves as caring, compassionate people.
As in most families, each of my sons has different interests, skills, and strengths. To have all of them involved in the same giving to others project wouldn’t have been wise. So my husband and I tried to encourage each child to find a project that matched his concerns and talents. Not only did they enjoy volunteering, but were more committed to their causes. And all three boys caught that “Helper’s High” and continue to want to give back to others. Here are ways to match your child’s interests, passions and strengths with volunteer projects:
1. Likes to read, write, tell stories: Offer to read or write letters for young kids, the elderly, or people with disabilities; start a letter-writing campaign about an issue that concerns him; be a pen pal with an orphan overseas, donate used books to a library, homeless shelter, or classroom.
2. Enjoys sports, theatre, gymnastics, or dance: Help coach younger children in dancing, gymnastics, a favorite sport, or acting, volunteer for the Special Olympics; help students with disabilities at a local school; repair toys for needy or sick kids; sew blankets for a shelter.
3. Is original, enjoys working alone to pursue own interests and goals: “Adopt” someone who could use a friend such as an elderly person; teach a special hobby—magic, juggling, art—to needy kids; ask permission to start a food drive at the parents’ workplace or community.
4. Enjoys being with others, likes joining or leading groups: Start a club and make snacks for homeless kids or soup for a shelter; put together a walk-a-thon donate proceeds to a local charity; go door-to-door with a parent and friends collecting warm clothes to give to homeless.
5. Is musical, plays instruments, likes to sing: Play an instrument at nursing homes; organize sing-alongs at a shelter or assisted living; teach needy kids to play an instrument.
6. Is logical and mathematics, enjoys science and math, likes to figure things out: Tutor math, science, or computers to younger children; play chess or checkers to kids at a hospital; make flyers asking for specific donations to a shelter and post in the community.
7. Likes to draw and design, imaginative and creative: Paint or hang up hand-painted pictures at a shelter, make greeting cards and deliver them to a hospital; do craft projects with the elderly.
8. Likes the out-of-doors and nature: Plant vegetables then donate the harvest to soup kitchen or shelter;help kids at a shelter plant a garden; clean up a park, plant trees on school grounds
Find a project that matches your child’s interests, abilities and passions to realize he is a difference maker.
Dr. Michele Borba is an educational psychologist, parenting expert, TODAY show contributor and author of 22 books including The Big Book of Parenting Solutions: 101 Answers to Your Everyday Challenges and Wildest Worries and UnSelfie: Why Empathetic Kids Succeed in Our All-About-Me World.
Check out: micheleborba.com or follow her on Twitter @micheleborba.