From our guest contributor, Michael Josephson.

Mignon McLaughlin tells us, “People are made of flesh and blood and a miracle fiber called courage.”

Courage comes in two forms: physical courage and moral courage. Physical courage is demonstrated by acts of bravery where personal harm is risked to protect others or preserve cherished principles. It’s the kind of courage that wins medals and monuments.Moral courage may seem less grand but it is more important because it’s needed more often.

Moral courage is the engine of integrity. It is our inner voice that coaxes, prods, and inspires us to meet our responsibilities and live up to our principles when doing so may cost us dearly.

It takes moral courage to be honest at the risk of ridicule, rejection, or retaliation, or when doing so may jeopardize our income or career. It takes courage to own up to our mistakes when doing so may get us in trouble or thwart our ambitions. It even takes courage to stand tough with our kids when doing so may cost us their affection.

Like a personal coach, moral courage pushes and prods us to be our best selves. It urges us to get up when we’d rather stay in bed, go to work when we’d rather go fishing, tell the truth when a lie would make our life so much easier, keep a costly promise and put the interest of others above our own.

The voice of moral courage is also our critical companion during troubling times; it provides us with the strength to cope with and overcome adversity and persevere when we want to quit or just rest.

At unexpected and unwelcome times, we all will be forced to deal with the loss of loved ones, personal illnesses and injuries, betrayed friendships, and personal failures. These are the trials and tribulations of a normal life, but, without moral courage, they can rob us of the will and confidence to find new roads to happiness and fulfillment

Moral courage is essential not only for a virtuous life, but a happy one. Without courage, our fears and failures confine us like a barbed wire fence.

The voice of moral courage is always there, but sometimes it is drowned out by the drumbeat of our fears and doubts. We need to learn to listen for the voice. The more we call on it and listen to it and trust it, the stronger it becomes.

This is Michael Josephson reminding you that character counts.

Michael Josephson is an influential and internationally renowned champion of character education for youth and ethical conduct in business, government, policing, journalism, sports, healthcare and law. He is credited by many as the person most responsible for reviving and professionalizing the character education in school and youth-serving organizations. In 1992, under the auspices of the Josephson Institute he created CHARACTER COUNTS!, the world’s most widely implemented character development initiative based on a common language of shared values – the Six Pillars of Character) and Pursuing Victory With Honor (1996), a companion program promoting ethics in sports.

Click here for more information on character education.

Check out seven tweets that made us smile this week!

WATCH: This little cowgirl trying to climb on her pony is the cutest thing in the Wild West! https://t.co/kumhOOJixF pic.twitter.com/KJbzavMt6M

— TODAY (@TODAYshow) October 26, 2016

87-Year-old Rescued After 4 Days in Bathtub Thanks to Concerned Waitress https://t.co/HOMhEOqCAx pic.twitter.com/xJOWapSEna

— Good News Network (@goodnewsnetwork) October 26, 2016

Rambo the dog is this ice cream truck’s most loyal (and cutest) customerhttps://t.co/hVG5fYdczJ pic.twitter.com/dppdt78vwf

— For Good's Sake (@goodnews) October 25, 2016

Literally just 17 dads who are everything https://t.co/NNrD3mWUn6 pic.twitter.com/5QHFDaKHSn

— BuzzFeed (@BuzzFeed) October 25, 2016

Brazil Opens Latin America’s First Sanctuary for Abused Circus Elephants https://t.co/UB6M6ns2zq pic.twitter.com/WeGl4dK21O

— Good News Network (@goodnewsnetwork) October 25, 2016

8 steps to make this a happier day https://t.co/xB7pbu1zvO pic.twitter.com/uPpWlbq78j

— TODAY (@TODAYshow) October 24, 2016

Kittens saved from brush fire after photographer hears their cries https://t.co/vmzjNwyjCU pic.twitter.com/e8oBVq0b2s

— For Good's Sake (@goodnews) October 24, 2016

Ask students to look around them and memorize everything red that they can see. Give them about 15 seconds to complete this task. Then, ask students to close their eyes and shout out everything brown that is around them. Ask them to open their eyes. Why was it difficult to name the brown things around them? (Because they were focused on something else).

Ask students to memorize everything brown for another 15 seconds. Ask students to close their eyes and shout out the brown things around them. Why was it easier to name the brown things this time? (Because they were focused on the question/task at hand).

Energy follows focus. If we are focused on the right things at the right time, it is easier to direct our energy in that direction and be present. When we are focused on other tasks, it is hard to be present.

Next, discuss/acknowledge the distractions that are taking your focus away from where it should be this today, this week, this year, etc. Which of those obstacles are within your control, and which ones are outside your control? How will you direct your energy and focus on those things you can control? What rituals can help you control your focus and be present? Develop a plan to deal with these distractions and keep your focus on the things that you can control.

Click here for more information on character education.

From Amy Smit, director of communications and administration

“Teachable moments.”  That is the phrase I keep repeating to myself every time we address the upcoming election with my two children, ages 10 and 12.

Whether it’s a candidate’s position on issues or a scandal that’s making headlines, the election has provided our family with an abundance of topics for family conversations.  My husband and I decided to embrace these opportunities to teach our kids about the political process, local and national issues, and how it all ties into our family values.

Here’s a few guidelines we used to help us decide what issues to tackle and how to handle it.

1. Will they hear about it at school?
   In our family, this is usually the first question we ask ourselves.  When there is “breaking news” or particularly controversial issues, we want to talk to our kids about it before they hear about it from their friends.   Not only can we give them correct information, it gives our kids a chance to ask questions.
2. How do we make this age appropriate?
   Parents need to decide for themselves what is appropriate for their children to hear.  We use the opportunity to have an age-appropriate conversation so they have a basic understanding of the issue (without too many details).
3. Can we deliver this message in a fair and non-partisan way?
   We want or kids to grow up to be independent thinkers with a desire to learn all sides of an issue. While our children know which candidates we support, my husband and I have intentionally tried to be non-partisan in conversations about the election.  This also is a great chance to reinforce the value of respect and tolerance of other people’s perspectives.
4. How does this align with our family values?
   We always try to tie conversations back to our family values.  (In our house, we use the Six Pillars of Character – trustworthiness, respect, responsibility, fairness, caring and citizenship.) We talk about how our values influence the candidates we support and the issues we care about most.  And just as importantly, we talk about how other people’s opinions are guided by their own values and are as justified as our own.

Ultimately, we hope that our family discussions teach our kids how to have meaningful conversations about important issues.  Amidst what could be the most uncivil election in our nation’s history, it’s a great goal for the rest of us, too.

Amy has worked with The Ray Center since 2004 and serves as director of communications and administration.  

She lives in Iowa with her husband, 10 year-old daughter and 12 year-old son.  

Click here for more information on character education.

From our guest contributor, Frank Sonnenberg.

People like talking about trust. So, why doesn’t trust receive the priority that it rightly deserves? In some cases, people are short-term thinkers. They’ll do anything to get what they want and aren’t willing to make the long-term commitment. Others conclude that it’s hard to measure the impact that our words and actions have on trust –– so why pay the price? Let’s look at what happens in the absence of trust.

The Cost of Distrust

In the relationships between people and groups, a lack of trust:

• Creates a distraction. Distrust causes people to lose sight of what’s important and become sidetracked by trivial matters.
• Damages relationships. Distrust promotes disharmony and uncertainty. It causes people to scrutinize what others say and second-guess their intent.
• Destroys communication. Distrust fosters dishonesty and lack of transparency. People spend more effort reading between the lines than listening to what’s being said.
• Damages teamwork. Distrust creates dissension. It pits people against one another. You can expect finger pointing, the blame game, and witch-hunts to thrive where there is distrust.
• Reduces competitiveness. When there’s distrust, people spend more time answering to the “paperwork police” than doing their job. This increases costs, but rarely adds value to the product or the customer experience.
• Encourages game playing. Distrust encourages people to spend more time trying to beat the system rather than trying to do something meaningful.
• Destroys individual initiative. Distrust encourages people to look busy rather than to actually be productive.
• Creates a toxic environment. Distrust creates an atmosphere that can be cut with a knife. In these environments, people opt for the political solution rather than for doing what’s right.
• Hurts loyalty and morale. Distrust is anxiety provoking and debilitating. Good people would rather leave an organization for greener pastures than spend their days covering their behind.

There is a tendency to believe that if something cannot be seen or heard, it does not exist. It brings to mind the question: If a tree falls in the forest and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound? Trust, as with other soft issues, is like the tree that falls in a forest. If we don’t believe that trust makes a sound, maybe it’s time to get our hearing checked.

Frank is an award-winning author. He has written five books and over 300 articles. Frank was recently named one of “America’s Top 100 Thought Leaders” and nominated as one of “America’s Most Influential Small Business Experts.” Frank has served on several boards and has consulted to some of the largest and most respected companies in the world. Additionally, FrankSonnenbergOnline was named among the “Best 21st Century Leadership Blogs” and among the “Top 100 Socially-Shared Leadership Blogs.” Frank’s new book, Follow Your Conscience, was released November 2014. © 2016 Frank Sonnenberg. All rights reserved.

Click here for more information on character education.

From our guest contributor, Michele Borba.

In 1966, Newsweek released the first part of their landmark cover story, “The Teen-Agers” A Newsweek Survey of What They’re Really Like,” investigating everything from politics and pop culture to teens’ views of their parents, their future and the world

Recently, Newsweek released a fifty-year follow up study called “The State of the American Teenager in Numbers: 1966 vs Now.” They set out of discover what’s changed and what’s remained the same for the teen set. Perhaps most fascinating was the seismic shift in “teen gadget ownership.” The numbers show just how monumental the change in technology has been in for our children. I just pulled a few differences:

Teen Gadget Ownership in 1966 

• Records: Boys 75% Girls 90%
• Transistor Radio: Boys 75% Girls 72%
• Encyclopedia: Boys 64% Girls 60%
• Hair Dyer: Boys: 0% Girls 65%

Teen Gadget Ownership in 2015

• Smartphone: Boys 73% Girls 78%
• Laptop/Computer: Boys 55% Girls 78%
• Bike: Boys 61% Girls 49%
• Tablet: Boys 48% Girls 51%

“Reality Check: Childhoods have changed and technology is clearly a part of our children’s lives. But sometimes we miss the big picture: how much our kids are plugging in and (even more important) potentially plugging out of real life. A recent report found that one third of infants are now using Smartphones and/or Tablets. And the average kid is plugged into digital devices longer than a typical school day and (in most cases), longer than he or she sleep.”

But something more is at stake: our children’s empathy and emotional intelligence. As I researched and wrote, UnSelfie: Why Empathetic Kids Succeed in Our All-About-Me World I was struck staggering statistics that show a forty percent drop in our children’s empathy levels within the last thirty years. And interestedly is that the biggest dip happened around the year 2000-about the same time computers, Tablets, Smartphones, and all the rest became central in our children’s lives. Yes, technology is taking giant leaps forward in so many ways as a society, but let’s remember that the cornerstone of humanity is empathy. Empathy is the seeds of compassion, courage, collaboration and all those traits that help our children grow to be good people. And most effective way for our children to learn empathy is always face to face. You don’t learn empathy facing screens.

Best empathy-building practices are always real and meaningful to children. (Hint: They’re usually unplanned and don’t cost a dime). Take advantage of those spontaneous moments with your children! Here are five ideas to keep our children’s empathy open from UnSelfie.

Be an emotion coach
Find natural moments to connect face to face to listen, and then validate your child’s feelings and boost emotional literacy. The face is the best tool for developing emotional literacy. (UnSelfie page 15)

Talk feelings
Kids need an emotion vocabulary to discuss feelings and guidance to become emotionally literate. Point out feelings in films, books, or real people and use more emotion words. And just keep naturally using more feeling words in your own vocabulary. (UnSelfie page 22)

Set unplugged times
Take a digital reality check and stick to your rules so kids have “face time.” Find times that are most convenient for all of your family, and then post them as a reminder. (UnSelfie: page 22-23)

Use literature to nurture moral imagination
Reading literary fiction-even for short periods-nurtures empathy and perspective taking ability like The Wednesday Surprise, The Hundred Dresses, The Boy in the Striped Pajamas. (Refer to Common Sense Media. Read as a family, or one on one. Or get two copies (for you and your teen) to read alone, and then discuss together. And always remember to ask: “How would you feel if that happened to you?” (UnSelfie page 85-92)

Ask “I wonder?”
Watch emotionally-charged films together (like Dumbo, Inside Out, E.T.). Teach your kids to ask themselves “I wonder: what does (Benjamin Button, Charlotte, or even Uncle Fred) think/feel/need?” Then encourage them to use same the “I wonder” question whenever they encounter someone new like the woman in line, child on swings, new student, man lying on the street. (UnSelfie pg 66)

Technology will continue to advance. Let’s just make sure that our children’s empathy levels do as well.

Dr. Michele BorbaMichele Borba is an educational psychologist, parenting expert, TODAY show contributor and author of 22 books including The Big Book of Parenting Solutions: 101 Answers to Your Everyday Challenges and Wildest Worries and UnSelfie: Why Empathetic Kids Succeed in Our All-About-Me World.

Check out: micheleborba.com or follow me on Twitter @micheleborba.

Click here to learn more about character education.