Imagine Kate, a smart 15-year-old, who enjoys spending time with her family and friends. She lives at home with her parents and two brothers. One night, Kate got a call from her boyfriend. He asked her to sneak out to meet him. Kate agreed. When her boyfriend picked Kate up, she smelled alcohol on his breath.

Within minutes of getting into her boyfriend’s car, he swerved over the yellow line and ran into an oncoming car. Kate and everyone in the other car (parents and two children) were injured and taken to the hospital. Kate’s boyfriend escaped with no injuries.

While this story is fictional, similar scenarios play out in cities and towns throughout our country. Someone makes a poor choice and its ripple affect reaches many people. Even in this short story, there are dozens of people who were affected by Kate’s decisions.

This example demonstrates one good tool for making tough choices. Ask yourself who will gain or suffer from your decision. The potential outcome to these stakeholders may steer you to a more ethical decision.

Have you ever known something you wish you didn’t?

A piece of confidential information has fallen into our laps and we’ve got a choice to make. Do we keep it to ourselves or share it?

Upon first glance, we could easily say that to be trustworthy, we must keep it to ourselves. However, upon further reflection, it may not be so easy.

Think about how respect plays into our choice. It could be disrespectful to share the information, but it could be disrespectful to not share it. Consider this: it is disrespectful to withhold information others need to control their own destiny.

This is a great example of values competing against each other:

• Should we be respectful and trustworthy and keep the secret to ourselves? OR
• Should we be respectful and trustworthy and share the information with those who need to know?

The way to decide may be easier than you think. We must look ahead to the consequences of our decision. What choice will ultimately result in the greater good?

Life requires tough decisions. We’ll be closing out the month by continuing to talk about how to make the tough decisions easier. Stay tuned.

Recently it seems as though disagreeing with someone justifies exposing them to criticism, harsh language and overall disrespect. Have we forgotten how to respectfully disagree?

We frequently use this great quote from Thomas Jefferson: “I will treat you as a gentleman, not because you are one, but because I am one.” Great quote, right? It reminds us that showing respect is about controlling our own actions, and not the beliefs, actions or reactions of others.

We don’t have to respect anyone’s opinions, lifestyle, politics or religion. However, we can still treat them respectfully. We can show a regard for others, solely based on their value as another human being.

We all share a collective responsibility in shattering this culture of incivility and disrespect. When we each commit to treat others with respect, the standard of acceptable behavior will change.

Let’s start today.